by Zara Mohammed, Relationships Columnist
Published in Relationships on 30th September, 2019
Alas, not everyone is blessed with the three C's - Charisma, Charm, and Confidence. When there is a girl you really admire, without the three C's you probably think it's impossible that someone as beautiful, smart, and popular as she is would even look at you once, never mind twice.
It's true that girls can be hard work. Most of us know that we can afford to be a little bit picky when it comes to guys, and we do sometimes like to set you the challenge of trying to impress us before we give you the time of day.
Luckily for you, it's not as complicated or impossible as you might think to attract the girl of your dreams.
So don't give up yet! I have compiled 3 fool-proof tips to show you how easy it can be to get a girl to like you.
I know, I'm starting with the most terrifying tip of all, but making eye contact with the girl you like is the best way to get her to notice you, let her know that you are interested in her, and show her that you are friendly and open.
Offering eye contact and a smile is like opening up a conversation, it is an invitation to engage, and you are sure to get at least a smile back. If you don't get one back it is a clue that going in for conversation is probably not the best next step to take.
If you make the mistake of going up to a girl and opening up a conversation before she has even had the chance to look at you puts them on the spot and makes things awkward.
Nobody likes being put on the spot, and this can instantly shut off your opportunities of getting to know someone. The girl may be so jarred by it that her main priority is to get away from you, rather than actually engage and have the opportunity to see what a great guy you are.
Making eye contact can be tricky though, especially if the girl doesn't know you yet. To her you could easily come across as a creepy stranger with a stalker vibe, which is far from attractive.
The key is to try and make it casual and spontaneous. If she senses you lingering around her and doesn't like it, she will avoid eye contact intentionally and move away from you.
A good tip is to try and get up close to the girl so that she can feel your presence next to her. I don't mean rub up against her arm or invade her personal space in a weird way of course, but if the girl senses that you are close by she is more likely to look up at you and feel a connection because of your proximity, than if you were standing grinning at her from a distance.
There is something much more intimate about someone smiling or talking to you when they are up close. She will literally feel your friendly vibe before you say anything, which will help her to lower any guards.
There is nothing more attractive than a man with manners. Being polite or helpful goes a long way in attracting the right attention from the girl of your dreams. All a girl wants at the end of the day is a kind, genuine guy that they can enjoy spending time with.
It is becoming more and more difficult to find men these days that have a natural capacity to be chivalrous, and even though us modern girls like to be independent and in control of our lives, we will always admire chivalry in a man. It is the stuff of romance novels and historical films. We all want a bit of fantasy in our lives.
Showing kindness or consideration is such a small thing, but it can have a powerful impact, and make people in the vicinity warm to you instantly. The great thing about it is that it is very easy to do. Check out some of these tips on how to show off your inner gentleman:
Hold the door open - It doesn't even have to be for the girl you are interested in, as long as she is able to observe the behaviour you are going to get brownie points. Do it with a smile and if the person says thank you, tell them they are very welcome.
Put someone else first - Showing consideration for others goes a long way in getting you noticed by those around you. You can offer your seat to someone who needs it or let someone who has fewer items go ahead of you in the queue at the supermarket.
Offer your help - Keep your eye open for ways to offer assistance to others. If you can offer help to the actual girl you like, even better. You could help offer information or directions to someone who is lost or looking for something.
Help someone with their hands full carry things to their car. Or offer to share your umbrella with the girl in the rain.
There are plenty of ways to show kindness, show just use your imagination and see what opportunities there are at the time.
Showing off a sense of humour is such a great way of reducing tension and putting a girl at ease in your company. When you use humour in your conversation you make it easy to talk to you. The situation becomes safe and feels familiar and friendly.
If you're not a naturally funny person, don't think you have to force it by coming up with corny jokes and one-liners though. Girls will see straight through you if you fail to be genuine, and the number one turn-off is when a girl senses that the interaction between you has been rehearsed.
So never prepare jokes ahead of time. It is best to be spontaneous and react the situation in the moment.
If you are at a loss, try to think of a funny story that happened to you that she might be able to relate to, and that is in context with the current situation. This is a great way to share a personal experience, which helps the girl to feel like she knows you a bit better.
So now you have a few tips to help you establish an initial connection with the girl of your dreams. Remember, the number one rule when you want to get a girl to like you is to try to be yourself.